Here I sit in my skeleton-staffed office a few days before 2008 graces the calendar.  I’ve received very few emails this week because most everyone that would email me is out on their personal between-the-holidays holiday.   However, to save vacation time and to meet my month-end/month-beginning deadlines I am at work right now.

I must admit that I’m a little bored.  I’ve been overly productive in the last three days after Christmas because there is no one here to bother me with extra activities.  Every few hours I check my junk mail folder just to see what insane stuff the spammers are trying to sell me.

And, to my surprise, even the junk mailers are on holiday.  I’ve received a minimal amount of spam this week. 

It made me shrug and smile a little.  Spam seemed less evil to me because it brought the humanality back to that junky practice since the humans are out on holiday and aren’t around to junk up my inbox.

Too bad the junkers can’t be on holiday all the time.

Lately, I’ve been thinking about suicide a lot.  Not for myself.  No.  That’s not an option for me.  Rather, I’ve been thinking about friends and people in my life who’ve been considering suicide or who have actually killed themselves.

With each passing day, it seems more and more socially ok for someone to choose killing themselves rather than living.  I’m not gonna lie, I have thought about suicide and its implications on my life.  Hasn’t everyone?  I haven’t thought about it enough to carry it out.  However, I have wondered, “If I ever did kill myself, how would I do it?”

What alarms me is that after typing what I just typed and admitting to thinking about those things is that I’m desensitized to the reality and morality of suicide.  I’m barely phased by what I just wrote.  That is very disconcerting to me.

Suicide has become so socially normal that it’s hardly impactful to anyone who doesn’t directly know the person who killed themselves.  What’s further sad, is that some people kill themselves after someone close to them killed themselves because they are in so much grief.

That’s just messed up, to put it bluntly.

The world itself (and this actually doesn’t surprise me) has an attitude of quick fixes and immediate solutions.  Rather than enduring and faithfully persevering, people choose to be faithless and impatient…to the point of personal death.

And what is the world’s answer for suicidal folks?  It puts suicide on a list of glorified and taboo subjects that aren’t to be talked about.  Did you know that most obituaries won’t cite suicide as the cause of death.  The only times when suicide is listed in an obituary is if the person is famous.  Every other time (for the most part) the family of the “lost” is too embarassed to publicly announce in writing that their loved one killed themselves.

*shakes head*

This is terrible.  Satan has got the world under a trap of silence.  He’s got people so full of shame and guilt that they won’t bring up their struggles.  Silence is darkness.  We need to shed light on Satan’s schemes instead of running away from awkward situations and problems. 

It’s too controversial to talk about too many things.  i.e. suicide, pornography, pre-marital sex, extra-marital sex, masturbation, cutting, eating disorders, drugs, alcoholism, abuse, STDs…etc.,etc. 

I don’t think people understand that we’re only feeding the fires of hell when we choose to be quiet about these things.  Satan l-o-v-e-s it when humans isolate themselves in the darkness of their problems.  When we separate ourselves from others, it’s all too easy for Satan to whisper lie after lie into our ear.  If we sit there in that darkness long enough, we become blind and then we cant see the way out.  And then, unfortunately, we become convinced that death is the only way to end the pain.

No.  *sigh* No.  That’s not the only option.  Love is the only option.  Speak love.  Speak life.  Bring the dark issues into the light. 

I just wrote this huge, insightful blog and then accidentally x’d out of the tab.  So now it’s gone.

Let me sum it up with this: God opposes the proud and gives grace to the humble.

Had you read that blog, that’s the lesson I hope you would’ve learned.  Just meditate on that terseness.  Heh.  Maybe I’ll rewrite it later.